What Makes the Difference?

For the six years I worked as a fully-commissioned Reserve Police Office, I wore a badge that identified me as "Patrolman." That’s OK – I didn’t fight to get it changed or complain about the fact that I was the only woman on the police force in our local municipality. I wasn’t out to prove a woman could do a man’s job. I just wanted to succeed in a profession I truly enjoyed.

I endured a generous amount of teasing and a healthy dose of skepticism during my first year or two as a cop. I never expected my fellow officers to cut me any extra slack. By the same token, they didn’t have to guess where the line was between good-natured teasing and harassment. We all worked hard at earning and maintaining mutual respect.

During my tenure in law enforcement, I was forced to endure several training sessions on "cultural diversity" and "gender sensitivity." Cops aren’t exactly the easiest audience to talk to anyway, but these seminars were particularly painful because of their inherent lack of practical application. Most of us left the presentations feeling more paranoid than ever, almost afraid that we would encounter someone different from us. Would we remember what to say? How to act? Could we avoid offending anyone? In life or death situations, would we worry more about possible litigation than the safety of ourselves and others?

I suppose it is because of my more down-to-earth bent that I avoided too many courses in psychology and sociology. I did, however, discover an incredibly useful area in the field of education, pursuing my Master’s Degree in Learning Styles, natural inborn strengths in each of us. It is these bents that help individuals determine what makes sense and what’s important.

More fundamental than personality type or temperament, learning styles actually provide a framework for helping us understand and communicate with others in a way their minds are designed to process the information. An understanding and appreciation of the various learning styles can transcend race, creed, culture and gender and allow a person to be paid the ultimate compliment – being understood.

It’s time to stop being so paranoid about "gender sensitivity" and "cultural diversity," and start valuing each other as individuals with unique strengths and abilities. Differences in gender and culture will always be a piece of the puzzle, of course. A no-nonsense, step-by-step man and his equally direct female counterpart will, by nature, have different perspectives. But that man and woman will still have more in common with each other than either of them does with a creative, artistic idealist, regardless of gender.

We do not need to "level the playing field." We need to recognize who plays which position best. There’s a big difference between the quarterback and the kicker in football. No one expects the same skills from both the guard and the center in basketball. The goal, however, is the same, regardless of position played. Accountability and performance do not have to be compromised in order to accommodate individual strengths. There are no "smartest" or "best" learning styles. It’s not what you are that makes the difference, but what you do with your inherent strengths.

I have been a teacher, a police officer and am now the CEO of an organization with international impact. The people I have worked with in every profession share at least one thing in common: everyone values being spoken to and dealt with in a manner that lets them know they are understood and appreciated for who they are and how they think. I admit that this whole learning styles approach takes more effort, especially in the beginning. But I’ve never seen anything that has a more profoundly positive effect on virtually every person in an organization.

For years we’ve heard phrases like "different strokes for different folks" and "it takes all kinds to make a world." Maybe we could do more than just pay lip service to the idea that diversity is actually a very positive aspect in the workplace. Learning to recognize and honor individual differences may just be the best way to become a truly productive and compassionate community.

Cynthia Ulrich Tobias is the best-selling author of the books: You Can't Make Me, The Way We Work, The Way They Learn, Every Child Can Succeed and Bringing Out the Best in Your Child..

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